


Your body is not foreign to me

by fortytworedvines



Category: Holby City
Genre: Berena Appreciation Week, F/F, They just can't keep their hands off each other, What a shame, confident women who know what they want
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-17
Updated: 2018-08-17
Packaged: 2019-06-28 10:10:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,717
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15705123
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fortytworedvines/pseuds/fortytworedvines
Summary: Six months after it opens, the new trauma centre in Nairobi invites international doctors to come and visit. Hanssen sends Serena to represent Holby. She's not best pleased - until she arrives and meets one Bernie Wolfe.





	Your body is not foreign to me

As the small child in the seat behind kicked her chair, Serena cursed Henrik Hanssen for the fiftieth time. She’d argued strenuously that trauma centres were not in her remit, that if anybody should go it should be Connie from ED, that if indeed she had to visit one, surely there were places closer than _Nairobi_. But Hanssen had remained implacable, and now she was trapped on an eight hour flight with the child from hell behind her, on her way to a country that she knew little about, on a fact-finding-mission that she didn’t want to be on.

The trauma centre in Kenyatta Hospital had opened six months previously, to much international fanfare. She’d read about it in the BMJ – and so had Hanssen apparently – and now the hospital was opening its doors to the wider community of doctors.

The child kicked her chair again, and Serena was on the point of turning round to give it a piece of her mind when its mum intervened and told it off. Serena sighed with relief, pulled out her headphones and switched her tv to the mediocre film that was being shown. Only four hours to go.

 

She’d left a cold, wet Holby. She stepped out of the plane into the bright warmth of a January day, tilted her head up to the sun and for the first time thought maybe she’d get something out of this week.

Passport control and baggage reclaim was about as fun as in any other place, and eventually Serena stepped out of the airport and into a waiting taxi. The international delegation were being put up at the Hilton. Transport, catering, all of it laid on. The hospital was serious in its desire to impress. Serena’s room had a huge double bed, a luxurious looking bath and was high up enough to have good views over the city. The worries that had led to her arguing so strenuously against this trip seemed to evaporate as she contemplated her surroundings. Of course Jason could cope on his own, AAU wasn’t about to collapse without her. She opened her bag, pulled out her cocktail dress and hung it up. The whole event was being kicked off by a fancy dinner and she’d packed the dress that was most likely to survive the flight. It was still a nice dress though; classic black in a flattering length and cut, and she had some sparkly jewellery to jazz it up.

She checked her watch; just enough time to get a nap in before she washed and dressed.

 

An hour long sleep refreshed her and the strong jets of water in the shower woke her up thoroughly. She pulled on her dress, tweaked it so it sat just so, and popped in her earrings. Last on were the dangerously high stilettos, in deep red. She checked her reflection in the mirror and nodded. She’d do.

The dinner was in a room away from other hotel guests. There was a bar near the door, to which Serena headed straight away. She definitely needed some alcohol in her before she started mingling. There wasn’t any Shiraz, but the bartender offered her a Kenyan red with the promise that it was very drinkable, so she accepted. She stepped away from the bar and looked round the room. There were twenty or so people already there, although she was disappointed to note they were all men, some chatting and some wandering around looking at the informative posters that were displayed at intervals. She didn’t know anybody there – hadn’t expected to – so she headed towards one of the posters. It detailed the beginning stages of building the trauma unit, very literally showing the foundations. Serena was impressed – to be able to build a purpose built unit rather than hashing together something from an already existing space would make it much more doctor-friendly.

‘Apparently the architects spent as much time talking to the doctors as they did on the plans,’ a soft voice said behind her, and Serena turned to see a blonde woman of about her own age smiling at her.

‘It must have been an amazing opportunity for them. I’m Serena Campbell, from Holby City hospital in the UK.’ She held out her hand and the other woman shook it firmly.

‘I’m Bernie Wolfe, from here.’

Serena did a double take at the name. ‘Bernie Wolfe? Not _the_ Bernie Wolfe?’

Bernie laughed, ducked her head as though she was embarrassed. ‘I’m not sure about being _the_ anything.’

‘I read your articles in the BMJ,’ Serena said, gazing at her. She hadn’t spent long imagining what Major Berenice Wolfe might look like, but when she had, it wasn’t soft brown eyes that hid behind a long blonde fringe, it wasn’t a woman of her own age who looked slender and breakable in a neatly tailored suit. ‘You’ve done incredible work here.’

‘I’ve got an amazing team,’ Bernie waved her hand self deprecatingly. Then she smiled, ‘Let me show you my favourite poster,’ she raised an eyebrow enquiringly and Serena nodded. She was the expert, after all. And it didn’t hurt that she had a lovely warm smile.

Bernie stopped in front of a poster a few down the room. ‘There,’ she said. Serena looked, looked again and chuckled. It was a series of pictures of the staff in training, snaps taken within a few seconds. The look of dawning horror and disgust as they got sprayed with vast quantities of blood was really quite fantastic.

‘Fake blood, right?’ she asked Bernie.

‘Of course,’ Bernie said. ‘I couldn’t find a patient willing to volunteer.’ Serena gazed at her, horrified, but then Bernie laughed, a loud, free, honking sort of laugh and Serena laughed too.

The next poster was of the outreach work the doctors of the trauma centre had been doing, and centre stage was Bernie, surrounded by laughing kids. She was kneeling on the floor, wearing scrubs, hair pulled back in a short pony tail, and she looked completely happy. Serena gazed at her, transfixed, then turned to the neater model beside her. ‘You look like you’re having fun.’

‘I was. It’s great to get out in the community, show the kids what being a doctor is all about.’ There was a slightly wistful look in her eyes.

‘Do you have any? Kids?’ Serena asked and then coloured, ‘I’m sorry – ”

‘It’s okay,’ Bernie said with a shrug, ‘Yes. Two. I missed a lot of their childhood when I was off on tours of duty. They’re all grown up now, Charlotte’s studying Fine Arts and Cameron’s training to be a doctor.’

‘Takes after you then?’

‘Ah,’ Bernie said with a faint grin, ‘My ex-husband is a doctor as well. If I’m honest Charlie did an impressive job of avoiding it. What about you?’

‘One tear away daughter, currently at university, _I hope_. And my nephew came to live with me recently, which has been a new sort of challenge.’

‘A happy family then?’

‘If we ignore the awful ex, yes.’

Bernie grinned. ‘Another member of the embittered ex-wives club? Fantastic.’

A gong sounded and Bernie touched Serena’s elbow lightly. ‘Time for dinner.’

There was a seating plan, and Bernie and Serena were at different tables.

‘Join me for a drink after?’ Bernie asked, dark eyes smiling.

‘Meet you at the bar,’ Serena nodded, and watched Bernie walk away to take her seat.

Serena’s companions were perfectly pleasant, and although she was disappointed by the food, which was solidly Italian rather than the local cuisine she’d hoped for, she had a nice time. The doctors at the table represented a fair spread of nationalities and it led to a very interesting discussion, which Serena engaged in whole heartedly. But occasionally she would glance over to Bernie’s table, looking at the enthusiasm on her face as she talked, and sometimes Bernie would look over at the same time and give her a smile and a wink, which warmed Serena through.

Then the plates were cleared away and the doctors stood up. One asked Serena if she’d like to accompany him to a bar down the road and she let him down gently. He wasn’t really her type.

Bernie was waiting for her at the bar. ‘You pulled,’ she said with a grin as she sipped her whiskey.

‘I was already engaged,’ Serena winked, noticed the blush that spread across Bernie’s cheeks. The bartender poured her another glass of wine. ‘Cheers,’ she said to Bernie.

‘There’s an outside room, if you fancy it?’ Bernie said questioningly.

‘Why not? Lead on.’

It seemed that nobody else had discovered the room that opened to the night sky, with plants and chairs.

‘Oh, lovely.’ Serena said with a sigh as they walked into the balmy night air. ‘It must be wonderful to live here.’

Bernie sat down at a table, gestured for Serena to join her. ‘Yes and no. It’s a beautiful place, but it’s hard to live a lie.’

Serena turned to her with wide open eyes. ‘What?’

Bernie glanced around to make sure they were alone. ‘I’m gay. It’s still illegal here.’

‘Oh,’ Serena said. ‘That must be hard.’

Bernie put her drink down, touched Serena’s hand softly. ‘It’s hard not to tell a woman that she’s beautiful, that you’d like to kiss her.’

Serena gulped. ‘Is that something you often want to say?’

‘Some times more than others.’ Bernie stroked her thumb over Serena’s knuckles, looked into her eyes searchingly. ‘Am I wrong here? Shall we go back inside and we’ll pretend I never said that?’

Serena took a breath. Part of her wanted to say yes, but the other part, the louder part, was concentrating on the sparks that Bernie’s touch was generating, on the fact that she’d struggled to take her eyes off her all evening, and that she really would like to get that jacket off her.

‘I came here to learn,’ she said after a moment, ‘And nobody said that learning should be restricted to medicine.’

Bernie reached up to touch her cheek. ‘You’ve never been with a woman?’ Serena shook her head and Bernie laughed ruefully, ‘That’s what comes of being here too long; my son would say my gaydar is broken.’

‘Not completely,’ Serena said with a shy smile. ‘I – never acted on it before. Didn’t say that I hadn’t thought about it.’

Bernie raised her eyebrows.

‘Cate Blanchett,’ Serena explained. ‘Did you see Ocean’s 8?’

‘I saw the pictures of her in it.’

‘I may have developed a little thing for blonde women in suits...’

Bernie looked down at herself, tugged her jacket a little straighter. ‘Well, I’m no Cate, but -’

‘But you’re rather lovely, all the same. Well Ms Wolfe, I do believe I have some interesting papers on trauma procedures that I’d like your opinion on. If you’d care to join me?’

Serena stood up, holding out her hand to Bernie. Bernie stood, let their fingers touch briefly.

‘Lead on, Ms Campbell.’

They headed back through the hotel, talking about a difficult case Serena had had on AAU recently, and how a specialised trauma bay might have been a help. It was supposed to be a cover, but Serena respected Bernie’s opinions too much to let the discussion be a sham, and by the time they reached her room they were thoroughly embroiled in a beat by beat dissection of the treatment that Serena had been able to provide. Bernie almost looked startled to find herself in a bedroom.

‘Carry on,’ Serena urged as her voice faded. ‘I’m not just interested in your body.’ She laughed as Bernie choked, and blushed a dull red.

‘Maybe another time,’ Bernie said as she pulled Serena towards her, ‘There’s more interesting things to do now.’

Serena’s heart almost stopped as Bernie’s arms went round her waist. She ran her own hands along Bernie’s arms, marvelling at the muscle that she could feel even through the jacket. ‘Let’s get this off.’ she murmured, tugging it gently off Bernie’s shoulders. Bernie shrugged out of it easily, threw it across a chair and pulled Serena close.

‘I’ve wanted to do this since I saw you this evening,’ she murmured as she leant in. Serena held her breath as Bernie’s lips touched her own, as her body was pulled flush against Bernie’s. Then she sighed, slipped her hands into the blonde waves, held tight as she opened her mouth, let Bernie’s tongue flutter in.

‘You’re delicious,’ Bernie said as she pulled back for a moment.

‘Don’t stop,’ Serena growled and Bernie laughed.

‘As you command.’ Bernie pulled her back in, ran her hands over her shoulders and down her back to find the zip of her dress. Unzipped it in one fluid movement. Serena wriggled so that it slipped down her body and Bernie’s fingers danced over her bare shoulders.

‘Gorgeous.’

Serena smiled at her. ‘Your turn.’ She slipped her fingers down Bernie’s shirt neck, listened to the hitch in her breath as she undid the buttons one by one. She pressed a palm to Bernie’s chest. ‘Your heart is racing.’

‘Can’t imagine why,’ Bernie said sardonically, then startled Serena by wrapping her arms round her and lifting her smoothly onto the bed.

Serena’s eyes lit up, ‘Why, Major. How strong you are.’

Bernie crawled up her body. ‘I have many talents,’ she said as she unclasped Serena’s bra.

Serena’s eyes darkened. ‘Show me.’

 

‘Serena,’ Bernie’s voice sounded by her ear, drawing her from her sleep. She opened her eyes to see Bernie smiling at her. ‘I’d better go.’

‘Whassa time?’

‘Nearly 5. I’ve got to get back to mine.’

Serena blinked and forced her brain to work. ‘You’re already dressed.’

‘You sound disappointed,’ Bernie remarked, amused.

‘Damn right. That body is a work of art.’

Bernie leaned over, kissed her deeply. ‘We’ve got a few more nights, I’m sure you’ll see it again.’

‘That’d better be a promise.’ Serena ran her hands through Bernie’s hair, sighing regretfully as Bernie stood up.

‘It’s a promise. See you at the hospital later.’

Bernie turned at the door, smiled again and pulled it shut behind her. Serena stared at the closed door for a moment, then leant back, closed her eyes and tried to go back to sleep.

 

 

The next morning was spent on a tour of the trauma centre and its facilities, led by Bernie and her co-lead, Francis. Serena took notes and tried not to be distracted by the way that a strand of hair was curling on Bernie's cheek, or the way that her scrub top showed off her toned arms, or the occasional wink that Bernie sent her way.

They had lunch in the canteen, after which a trip to the wildlife park had been organised. The hospital had planned to show off their surroundings as well as their new trauma centre.

Bernie found her way over to Serena, sitting down at her small table just before one of the other doctors managed it.

'He was eyeing you up,' Bernie muttered.

'I'm pretty sure that there are men here who don't have any designs on me,' Serena said with a smile.

'Well, they're fools then. I'm coming to the wildlife park, by the way,' Bernie said before biting into her falafel wrap.

'You are? That's great.'

'Apparently I need to work on my socialising skills,' Bernie rolled her eyes, 'Just because I don't charm people like Francis does.'

'You charmed me quite nicely,' Serena murmured.

'You're a special case. And it was for my own nefarious purposes, not for work.'

Serena yawned, 'Sorry.'

'I can't think why you're tired. Want a coffee?' Bernie asked as she stood up.

'Please.'

'Any preference?'

'Strong and hot is all I care about.' Serena looked up at Bernie, winked and enjoyed the soft flush that spread across her cheeks.

 

After lunch they were all packed into a bus for the short drive to the wildlife park. Serena glared at any of the men who tried to sit next to her, and Bernie, who was last on, slipped into the vacant seat with a smile. As they drove through the city she pointed out some of her favourite spots to Serena, whose breath hitched every time Bernie brushed against her.

At the park, Bernie paid the entrance fee and then they were shown to the jeeps that would take them around. ‘Too far to walk’, Bernie said, as she and Serena hung back, letting the others claim their spots first. When all the men were safely onboard their vehicles, Bernie flashed a small smile. ‘Oh look. Nobody else in the last one. We’ll have it to ourselves. What a pity.’

‘Won’t you get in trouble for lack of mingling?’

‘At this moment in time, I can’t bring myself to care.’ Bernie offered Serena her hand, helped her up into the jeep. She smiled to the driver and murmured a few words that Serena didn’t understand.

‘What was that?’ she asked.

‘Oh, Swahili.’

‘You speak Swahili?’

Bernie shrugged, ‘I’ve learnt a little. Most people in Nairobi speak English but it’s useful to know a bit of both. I used to pick up languages well enough when I was on tours.’

‘Is there no end to your talents?’ Serena asked. Bernie caught her gaze and Serena blushed, remembering a number of Bernie’s talents she’d experienced the night before. She squirmed in her seat.

‘Okay, Campbell?’

‘Do you have plans tonight?’ Serena blurted out.

Bernie studied her. The jeep bounced over a rut and she fell against Serena, their arms pressed together. She didn’t move away quickly, brushed her hand subtly down Serena’s side. ‘I think I do now,’ she said huskily.

The wildlife park was spectacular. Serena was frustrated that she couldn’t stare in every direction at once, and Bernie laughed at her, even though she was equally captivated by the animals. At one point, she pointed out the giraffes in the distance with the city sky line far behind them.

‘This makes the entire trip worth it,’ Serena murmured to herself as she gazed in wonder.

‘Well, that’s a lovely slight on my trauma centre, not to mention the rest of me.’

‘Oh, god. Bernie – I didn’t mean...’ Serena’s voice trailed off.

Bernie laughed, ‘It’s okay. I feel the same way myself. This is one of my favourite places in the world. Serena,’ Bernie reached for her, ‘I’m so glad I get to share it with you.’

 

Serena went back to Bernie’s that night. The other doctors had split into various groups and were heading out to investigate Nairobi. A few had invited Serena along and although she was grateful that they were making the effort she had no qualms in blowing them off for Bernie.

Bernie’s flat was ten minutes or so from the hospital. Serena clung to her seat and hoped that she would live that long. Nairobi traffic seemed to follow no laws and Bernie urged her car into tiny gaps without blinking.

Bernie’s apartment block was large and modern. She led Serena through the car park and into the lift. Her flat was on the third floor, and Serena stared around as Bernie opened the door and let her in. It was large, airy and spacious, and Serena imagined it would be gleaming if it wasn’t scattered in magazines and take away cups.

Bernie blushed. ‘Sorry. I meant to tidy but I ran out of time.’ She shoved a pile of journals off her sofa and gestured for Serena to take a seat.

‘It’s fine,’ Serena sat down, then got up immediately to gaze at the view from the large windows. ‘Reassuring to know you have some flaws.’

‘I have plenty,’ Bernie murmured.

‘Is that a park over there?’ Serena pointed at the green she could see in the distance.

‘One of many. This is an incredible city – mostly.’

Bernie headed into the kitchen. ‘It’s goat stew and chapati for dinner.’ She poked her head out again with a frown, ‘Is that okay? I forgot that goat isn’t exactly standard cuisine in the UK.’

‘Fine,’ Serena said, ‘It’s nice to try new things.’

‘You’re certainly trying new things out here,’ Bernie said with a grin as she disappeared again.

Dinner didn’t take long as Bernie only had to reheat the stew and fry the chapati. Serena cleared the table for her by simply dumping everything that was on it into a pile on the floor.

‘Thanks,’ Bernie said as she carried the bowls of food out and passed Serena cutlery. ‘Be brutally honest. There’s plenty of takeaways within striking distance if it’s not to your taste.’

Serena scooped up some of the sauce on her chapati and tried it. ‘It’s lovely,’ she said.

‘Have the meat before you commit yourself.’

Serena speared some on her fork, bit it cautiously. ‘Oh,’ she said after she swallowed. Bernie raised a questioning eyebrow. ‘It’s not massively different to lamb, is it. Bernie, this is really good.’

Bernie smiled. ‘Took a few weeks of living on takeaways to get me to start cooking for myself. I’ve been used to army rations. I’m glad it’s okay.’

‘More than okay,’ Serena said around another mouthful. ‘Whoops, sorry, that was rude. I was hoping last night’s meal would be more local.’

‘You can find food from any culture you fancy here. I’m sure I saw somewhere selling haggis once, but I haven’t been able to find it since.’

‘Eating haggis in Kenya would definitely be an experience.’

Dinner soon vanished and Bernie cleared their plates to the sink.

‘I’ll wash, you dry?’ Serena offered.

Bernie looked taken aback. ‘Oh, thanks. I usually just-’

‘Leave them? I guessed.’ Serena tempered her words with a grin and Bernie shrugged, chuckled in acknowledgement.

‘I may have fallen into bad habits, being on my own so long.’

Serena filled up the sink, started on the plates. ‘How long has it been, if you don’t mind me asking?’

‘Uh, lets see. Got blown up, um. Three years ago now? About that, anyway. Came home, recovered, divorced the husband, been pretty much on my own since.’

The pamphlets sent to Holby had covered Bernie’s resume briefly, so Serena was already aware of the incident that had ended Bernie’s military career. Despite that, she was still slightly shocked at the casual way Bernie referenced it.

‘Why did getting blown up make you divorce your husband?’ she asked with some curiosity, as she passed a clean plate over to be dried.

‘I’d only recently realised that I wasn’t straight, and I suppose it gave me the kick I needed to do something about it. What about you? What happened with your ex?’

Serena sighed. ‘He was a cheat, a liar and as it turns out, a drunk to boot.’

‘He cheated on you?’ Bernie stacked the clean plates in the cupboard, then clasped Serena’s shoulder warmly, stroking her neck softly. ‘He must have been mad.’ She pulled Serena round to face her, pressed a gentle kiss to her lips.

‘We haven’t finished,’ Serena protested half heartedly, then slipped her hands to Bernie’s waist, closed her eyes as Bernie deepened the kiss.

‘Never mind the dishes,’ Bernie said when she eventually took breath ‘They’re not going anywhere.’

Serena looked ruefully at the damp spots she’d made on Bernie’s top. ‘Sorry.’

Bernie grinned, stripped her top off in one smooth movement. ‘Problem solved.’ Then she gripped Serena firmly, hoisted her onto the kitchen side. ‘I’ve been wanting to do this all day.’

Later, a trail of clothing marked their path from the kitchen to Bernie’s bedroom.

 

Bernie drove Serena back to her hotel in the morning. She had to work and Serena needed to change. Serena was attending a series of talks at the conference centre in the morning, and was scheduled to be observing in the trauma unit in the afternoon.

‘I’ll see you later,’ Bernie said, tightening her hand around Serena’s as they said goodbye. ‘Enjoy the morning.’

‘Thanks,’ Serena gazed at her, enjoying the way the early morning sun lit her face.

Bernie gave her a nudge. ‘Go on with you, or we’ll both be late.’

 

The talks were interesting and Serena took detailed notes, but she missed Bernie’s presence in the room. She was escorted to the hospital after lunch, shown to the trauma centre staff room, where she changed into the designated scrubs with hands that would have shaken if she’d had any other profession.

‘Cool it, Campbell,’ she muttered to herself.

Bernie was chatting to a nurse when she walked onto the ward, looked up and spotted her, a wide smile spreading across her face. ‘Serena! Come and meet everybody.’

Serena had arrived in a lull, and Bernie introduced her to the large staff, then beckoned her into her office. Bernie hadn’t eaten yet, shovelled down a falafel wrap while Serena flicked through some of the notes that Bernie had written in the early days of the centre. They were engaging and Bernie was an entertaining writer. Bernie finished her lunch and came over, perched on the edge of Serena’s chair and pointed out things that she might do differently now, months in.

Then there was a commotion outside and Bernie stood smoothly. ‘That’ll be for us. Let’s go and scrub in.’

She showed Serena to the scrub room then vanished to get the details of the incoming patient. Serena washed up, wondered as she did so that it could feel so very familiar, a world away from Holby. Then Bernie was back, going through her routine meticulously.

‘Right then, Ms Campbell, let’s show you what you came for.’ Bernie winked, sending heat flushing through Serena’s body, and she stumbled to keep up with Bernie as they went into theatre.

Serena stood well out of the way while Bernie’s team assembled around her. They were like a well oiled machine, every person knowing precisely what their role was.

‘We’ll be performing an atriocaval shunt,’ Bernie told them and there was a whisper of noise that stilled instantly. Serena, though, couldn’t hold back her gasp and Bernie looked up at her, questioning, nodded to Serena that she could say whatever she wanted to.

‘There have only been eight successful shunts,’ Serena said, quietly. Bernie’s eyes were fixed on hers, face hard to read when covered by her mask, and she didn’t want to seem like she was questioning their lead surgeon. To her surprise, Bernie’s eyes crinkled in amusement.

‘And the last one was performed by me,’ she said and Serena’s jaw dropped slightly.

And then they began, and watching Bernie operate was unbelievable. She was confident enough when talking about her work, single minded when it came to sex, but she was on another level now. Not arrogance, Serena thought. She was just completely self-assured; she simply knew exactly what she could do, and did it. She moved smoothly, no fumbling, no slips. Spoke quiet, calm words to the anaesthetist and nurses as she worked a kind of magic. And Serena was spellbound. Watching Bernie was better than an aphrodisiac. Her abiding thought was a wish that she could work with Bernie someday, be part of it.

The procedure was, of course, successful.

 

Bernie stripped off her mask as she left the theatre, smiled at Serena. ‘Well, thoughts?’

Serena stepped closer, lowered her voice to a whisper just for Bernie, ‘You’re incredible.’

‘The team did well,’ Bernie said with a nod and turned on the sink tap to begin washing.

‘No, Bernie,’ Serena touched her with a tentative hand, ‘You. Watching you was just unbelievable and,’ she glanced around quickly, blushed as she added, ‘It turned me on.’

Bernie halted in her washing, looked Serena up and down with darkening eyes, ‘Is that so? Well, that’s food for thought. That’s the fun bit over anyway, now the paperwork.’

Serena followed Bernie to her office. They discussed the procedure in more detail as they crossed the ward, so Serena was taken by surprise when they reached Bernie’s office and Bernie closed the door shut behind her, flicked the lock, and pushed Serena gently against it.

‘Turned you on, did I?’ she murmured as she kissed Serena’s neck, hands slipping down to Serena’s scrub bottoms.

‘Bernie,’ Serena gasped as Bernie’s fingers found their way under her waistband.

‘Quiet, Campbell,’ Bernie warned her as long, clever fingers dipped lower. ‘Oh, you weren’t lying. Is this all for me?’

Serena tipped her head back against the door with a groan as Bernie’s fingers got to work.

‘You’re gorgeous like this,’ Bernie murmured, ‘You feel so good. It’s not going to take long is it? You’re so hot for me.’

Serena came with a gasp and a shudder and Bernie braced her against the door, holding her upright until Serena opened hazy eyes. Then she let go of her, licked her fingers clean lasciviously, drawing another whimper from Serena.

‘God, Bernie,’ Serena whispered, ‘Are you trying to kill me?’

Bernie raised an eyebrow, ‘You started it,’ she said primly, moved away to her desk and shuffled her paper. ‘There is paperwork to do. Pull up a chair and we’ll get started.’

‘Don’t you – would you like –?’ Serena gestured vaguely at her.

‘I can wait till this evening.’

‘Oh, do we have plans?’ Serena said archly, recovering herself slightly.

‘I think at this point we should just assume we always have plans, don’t you?’

 

They went out to dinner at a small restaurant that Bernie knew, then straight back to Serena’s hotel room. Clothes were shed at a swift rate as they raced from the door to the bed.

When Serena came to, later, it was to Bernie tracing soft circles on her back. ‘Mmm, that’s nice,’ she murmured.

Bernie pressed a kiss on her shoulder blade. ‘About earlier. I’m sorry.’

‘Earlier?’ Serena blinked, confused.

‘When I – um. You know. In the office. I don’t want you thinking I often ravish beautiful women in the middle of work.’

‘Just every so often?’ Serena smiled, but there was no response from Bernie. She twisted round to kiss her. ‘Look, maybe it wasn’t entirely professional but I didn’t say no.’ Serena allowed herself a long look, up and down Bernie’s slender body, ‘I didn’t want to say no.’

Bernie blushed under Serena’s scrutiny. ‘I don’t know what came over me.’

‘Don’t you?’ Serena rolled on top of her, pressed her body firmly against Bernie’s and twined her fingers tightly in her hair. ‘I think I do.’

‘God, I’m going to miss you.’

‘There’s so much going on here that you’ll forget me soon enough.’

Bernie pushed Serena off her gently. ‘I won’t,’ she said softly, stroked her fingers down Serena’s cheek and pushed a curl of hair behind her ear, ‘I won’t, and I don’t want to. I want to remember all of this, every moment we’ve spent together.’

Bernie’s eyes held Serena transfixed. ‘Bernie, you’re talking as if...’

‘Look at this idiot, falling for a woman who lives the other side of the world.’

‘Bernie -’ Serena stared at her, almost speechless.

Bernie blinked rapidly, then smiled. ‘Never mind me,’ she kissed Serena, ‘You know what I’d like to do now?’

‘What?’

‘This.’ Bernie suddenly disappeared from view and even as Serena’s body rejoiced in her administrations, she couldn’t quite shake the look in Bernie’s eyes from her mind.

 

The final morning of the event was spent at the conference centre, with more talks from Francis and other African trauma surgeons. Bernie was on duty at the hospital and Serena missed her. She took copious notes though, made a concerted effort to keep her mind on task. Then, after lunch, it was back to the hospital for a tour of the whole building, stopping off finally at the trauma centre.

Bernie was by the nurses station when they walked in, looked up, eyes searching for Serena and smiling when she saw her. This was a chance for the doctors to ask any last questions they had of the trauma centre staff, so Serena couldn’t monopolise Bernie. In fact she couldn’t think of any coherent questions at all, so she simply sat in a visitor’s chair and watched the hustle and bustle.

Both Bernie and Francis were pulled away to operate before too long and this signalled the end of the day. The visitors were heading back to the hotel for one last evening of drinking and eating before they all went their separate ways in the morning.

Serena was also headed back to the hotel, to shove all her things in her bag and check out. She was going to be spending her last evening in Nairobi in Bernie’s apartment.

 

Bernie was late to pick her up, but Serena wasn’t particularly bothered. It wasn’t like she didn’t know what a surgeon’s life was like. She sat in the hotel bar, drinking a tolerable red, until Bernie burst through the doors, hair everywhere and cheeks flushed.

‘Serena! I’m so sorry! Surgery overran.’

‘Bernie, Bernie. It’s okay. Shall we get going?’

When they got to her apartment, Bernie threw her keys onto the table, put Serena’s bag beside it, and then kissed Serena more sweetly than she ever had before. She took Serena by the hand, led her carefully into the bedroom and pushed her down onto the bed. Serena tried reaching for her, but Bernie took her hands and pinned them to her pillow.

‘Not this time, Serena,’ she said in a low voice that sent thrills shooting through Serena’s body. She undressed Serena slowly, taking her time with every item of clothing, kissing and caressing every newly exposed piece of skin, until Serena was writhing beneath her. She took Serena slowly to the brink and back down again, until Serena was almost crying, and Bernie finally took pity, tipped her over the edge and Serena came with tears on her face.

‘Bernie?’ Serena said when she eventually recovered her voice, stroking back the fringe that was falling into Bernie’s eyes.

‘Wanted to give you something to remember.’ Bernie wrapped her arms around Serena and Serena sighed in the warmth of her embrace.

‘I’m not likely to forget that in a hurry.’

Bernie sighed as she nuzzled Serena’s greying strands. ‘I know I can’t ask anything of you. But I’ll be visiting the kids in six months or so. I’m not asking you to wait, I – it’s not – I can’t promise – but… Serena. Will you stay in touch? And if, by some small miracle, you happen to be single when I visit…’

‘Yes, yes, of course.’ Serena stared at Bernie, heart full of all the things that she wanted to say but couldn’t, because she would be on a plane in twelve hours. Instead, she wound her fingers into Bernie’s hair, tugged in the way that made Bernie make beautifully plaintive sounds. Then she set to work divesting Bernie of her remaining clothes and making sure that every inch of Bernie’s body was indelibly printed in her memory.

 

It was an early flight back to Holby, so they woke up in each others arms to the harsh sound of the alarm. Bernie struggled out of bed, straight to the kitchen to get the coffee on. Serena got dressed with a body that didn’t want to work, accepted the coffee that Bernie offered her. They sat in silence, either side of the table, sipping and staring at each other and pretending that everything was fine.

Serena had double checked her passport and her last remaining belongings were safely packed, and Bernie was about to open the door when she turned. Grabbed Serena firmly, ran her hands down her back and up to caress her neck, kissed her fiercely. ‘Don’t forget me,’ she whispered, pressing her forehead to Serena’s.

Tears sprang into Serena’s eyes. ‘I won’t. I won’t. And I’ll email.’

They looked at each other again, then Bernie stroked her thumb down Serena’s cheek. ‘Okay, okay. Let’s get going then.’

 

Bernie saw her into the airport, all the way to the security gate. She tried to smile as she pulled her passport out of her bag.

‘Be seeing you,’ Bernie said, with tears in her eyes.

‘Goodbye,’ Serena said, offered Bernie her hand. Bernie took it and they stared at each other for a beat too long, before voices behind them reminded them where they were. Serena dropped her hand, offered a weak smile, which Bernie returned, and then turned to go through the gate. When she’d got through she looked back. Bernie had gone.

She held the tears back until she was on the aeroplane.

 

Back at Holby, Hanssen was delighted with the notes that she had taken, suggested that she put together a proposal for a trauma unit. Serena promptly emailed Bernie, delighted to have a professional excuse. And if the emails were ostensibly about work, they both sneaked in hints of their feelings, of the way they missed each other.

Serena remained single. It wasn’t because of Bernie, she told herself, just nobody had come along. And in her heart she knew it was because she would never find anybody who could match her, and on her calendar she noted down the weeks until Bernie would be in the country.

 

After a month of emails with Bernie, Serena handed in her proposal to Hanssen. The board accepted it – naturally, it couldn’t have been better – funds were allocated and work began. With only a week till the opening date, Hanssen called Serena up to his office.

‘The board have reviewed staffing on AAU,’ he said calmly, ‘And have decided that the trauma unit should have its own consultant.’

‘What?’ Serena snapped.

‘As I said, there would be far too much work for you to manage on your own.’

‘So you’re turfing me out of the unit that I’ve done all this work for?’

‘You’re not happy.’

‘Did you think I would be?!’

‘We’ve appointed a specialist. Somebody with considerable experience.’

‘And you didn’t think to mention it before now? A new consultant on _my_ ward, running _my_ trauma unit?’ Serena stared at Hanssen, utterly furious.

‘They’ll be starting next week.’ He shuffled some papers on his desk. ‘I would suggest that you give them a chance.’

Serena fled back to her office, locked herself in, sobbed a few angry tears before she got a grip of herself, sent a seething email to Bernie about it all.

It didn’t take long for Bernie’s reply to arrive. ‘It might not be as bad as you expect’.

‘As bad. As bad?!’ Serena groaned to herself. She’d expected Bernie at least to take her side. She sighed, ran her hands over her face tiredly. Nothing she could do about it now anyway. She’d just have to be an ice queen. Run them off her ward with frigid politeness.

 

Morven skipped up to her in the foyer. ‘The new consultant is arriving today! Aren’t you excited?’

‘Ecstatic,’ Serena said dryly, rolling her eyes. She walked slowly to the lift, then slowly along to AAU. There was the usual chatter on the ward, but she headed straight to her office, wanting a few moments to compose herself.

She opened the door and stood stock still.

‘Hello you.’

Bernie. In her office. ‘What?’ Serena said, dumbstruck, then launched herself at her, hugged her fiercely. ‘Bernie!’

Bernie pulled her in, kissed her regardless of the ward that was right outside the window. ‘I love you,’ she said as she peppered Serena’s face with kisses, ‘I should have said it before. I love you.’

‘I love you too,’ Serena said, pulling back, staring at Bernie with bemusement. ‘But what are you doing here?’

‘And I thought you were bright,’ Bernie teased, stroking her hair fondly, ‘I’m your new consultant.’

‘No… really?’

‘I needed a change. And somebody told me that there was a new unit opening in Holby.’

‘Hanssen set this up.’

‘Well, I encouraged him a little.’ Bernie scanned her face, ‘Are you okay with this? I don’t want to step on your toes. I know you weren’t keen on the idea.’

‘I hated the idea of some stranger coming in. But you aren’t a stranger, Bernie. I’m so happy you’re here.’ And with a beaming smile, Serena kissed her, then pulled her towards the door. ‘Come and meet the team.’

**Author's Note:**

> For Berena Appreciation Week. Day 5: Nairobi  
> The title is a sort of pun, because I'm hilarious, right?


End file.
